grocery store smackdown imminent

I realize posting this on my wedding anniversary may seem a tad tacky, but it is what it is. (In other words, tacky).

To begin with, I have not taken my own advice and gone through other not hot checkers' aisles at my grocery store. I'm giving my [not so] secret crush one hundred a few more chances. So, this evening I ran in for some very important food items and as we were having an intimate moment finishing our depressingly chaste checker/customer exchange, this happened behind me:

Woman my age [not old] talking to her preschool daughter in the cart: Okay, honey, put the things on the counter. Why are you being so shy? Did you say "Because he's so handsome?" Heehee.

Oh yes she did.

So I flashed him.


Alright, I did not. I also did not raise my eyebrow menacingly at her (I'm pretty sure). Though I surely emanated wrath in her general direction.

But I did quickly deposit our groceries in the car before running back into the store to grab the Willamette Week, to show what an edgy suburban mom I am. An edgy suburban mom willing to take down her competition. Bring it, girlfriend.