irony deficient

I was all set today to give blood in honor of a soon-to-be student at my school. If you know me even a tiny bit you are aware that I tend to avoid a) exercise, b) bodies of water, and c) needles and/or bloodletting. However, this is a special situation; I'd like to say it was purely altruistic - my decision was 99% because I wanted to help our future Renegade - but I also felt the need to be a Big Girl and show my students that despite my nearly debilitating fear apprehension about needles & blood, I could buck up and do it.

So I made an appointment (to make it official - knowing others would be expecting me kept me from making excuses or, more likely, chickening out) for 3:15 this afternoon. At 3:10, my stomach started to twist and I began sweating slightly, yet I shuffled over to the junior high gym and checked in. I think I scared some of my students who were waiting there; I could feel myself being less congenial & encouraging and more withdrawn & twitchy. I read the [very long and involved yet fascinatingly informative] Pre-Donation Handbook; I got my number for the Pre-Donation Screening. I waited about 2 excruciating days 10 minutes before a smiling young woman invited me to the secret interview area. We chatted about my day and then without warning I treated her to my increasingly shrill and anxious policy of how I generally do not deal with needles unless medically mandated but felt this was a necessary thing to do today. She compassionately yet professionally moved forward with the interview (I surreptitiously watched her laptop for an entry of "Crazy Lady") then we were at the part where she poked my finger to do a quick test for iron richness.

And this is where my story comes to a screeching, bloodless end. Other than the menacingly slow-flowing droplets used to determine my LOW LOW LOW Fe content, there was no giving from me today. Despite my cowardly reservations, I was looking forward to joining that group of noble individuals who do this regularly; I had visions of being one of those cheerfully brave people who step right up when the Blood Mobile parks in front of Whole Foods. But most of all, I wanted to be part of the solution for our student.

I will get myself some supplements and try to gag down some leafy greens and be ready for next time. If you can give, please do. Click here and find a donation site nearby.